A Game Of Bogies
by Hippopants
Summary: Harry notices that the Weasley twins aren't acting like themselves, so he introduces them to the wonderful game of Bogies...
1. Harry Has A Bright Idea

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters or the fabulous game of Bogies. They belong to the genius of J.K. Rowling, and Dick and Dom respectively._

* * *

01 - Harry Has A Bright Idea…For Once.

Fred and George were incredibly bored. They couldn't remember a single time that they'd ever been this bored, and what was worse, they were only two weeks into the new school term. With not being allowed to join the Order and no new tricks as yet to play on Filch, they were at a loss with what to do with themselves. On this particular day, more and more people had been noticing that something wasn't right with the Weasley twins – not that there ever was anything right with them. Harry specifically had noticed the Weasley twins' unusual lack of enthusiasm.

"Hey Ron. What's up with Fred and George?"

"I dunno, they've been like this for ages. No one can get a straight answer out of them."

On hearing this, Harry had decided that he would make it his mission to cheer the Weasley's up; after all, they'd helped him out on so many occasions, so why shouldn't he repay the favour?

That night, he found the twins lounging round the common room. Fred was spread out on one sofa, a hand over his eyes. George was lying on the floor, absent-mindedly tracing circles on the floor with his finger. Harry wandered over and sat on the arm of Fred's chair.

"Hey guys. What's up?" he said, trying to make it sound like he was just making conversation. He waited for an answer, but silence reigned. George continued with his circle-tracing, whilst Fred didn't make any movement whatsoever. Harry sighed; this was worse than he thought. He continued watching them for a moment before speaking again.

"Come on, guys. It can't be that bad."

This time, he provoked a reaction. Fred removed his hand from his eyes and looked at Harry.

"We're bored. Nothing exciting has happened. We're not allowed to be in the Order 'cause we're too young…"

"Story of our lives…" interrupted George.

"Right, and _you_ haven't got up to anything exciting we can join in with, so we are wallowing in our depression," finished Fred, before once again covering his eyes with his hand. Harry was surprised. Fred and George, the mischievous masterminds, were actually bored! What could he do to cheer them up? After a minute's contemplation, inspiration struck. He wasn't sure what the twins would say, but anything was worth a try.

"I might have an idea for you," began Harry slowly.

"And what would that be?" George asked without turning round. Harry looked around conspiratorially and leaned in to whisper.

"Bogies," he whispered, then sat back and admired the effect of his words. Fred's hand moved slowly off his face, whilst George turned over and stared at Harry, not sure if he'd heard correctly.

"What?" he said, confused. Harry grinned.

"Bogies," he said again. Fred and George looked at each other; Harry had surely gone insane. But they were intrigued nonetheless. Fred sat up and George scooted closer to Harry.

"What's Bogies?" asked Fred in a low voice. Harry smiled. Now he had their attention.

"It's a Muggle game. Just your sort of thing. But I don't know…" Harry paused.

"C'mon Harry stop teasing!" said George.

"Ok ok. It's a competition, right, and one person has to say the word 'Bogies' quietly. Then the other person has to say 'Bogies' but a bit louder, and then it goes back to the first person. You keep doing it, getting louder and louder until one person chickens out, or can't say 'Bogies' louder than the other person." Harry sat back and grinned at his companions. Fred and George exchanged glances.

"Ok, but what's the point in that?" asked George, though he didn't really care; competitions were fun, especially when there was the opportunity to make lots of unnecessary noise.

"There isn't a point; it's pointless," said Harry, then added, "But you do have to do it in public places." He giggled at the looks of pure joy on Fred and George's faces. Pointless fun was their specialty. If one word could describe their grins, 'evil' would be it. They got up.

"Well, thanks Harry. We're off to plot. See you at dinner," said Fred, as George winked at Harry. Harry watched them go to their dorm room. '_Dinner is going to be interesting_,' he thought to himself.


	2. Bogies For Dinner, Anyone?

02 - Bogies For Dinner, Anyone?

"Explain it once more, Harry," said George as he, Harry and Fred went down to the Great Hall. Harry sighed and explained it for the third time. '_Perhaps it was a bad idea to tell them this game_,' thought Harry, but upon entering the Great Hall, he realised that it would actually be rather funny, and besides, at least _he_ wasn't going to get into trouble for once.

When everyone was seated, and the food had been served, Fred looked up at George, who was seated opposite him, and leaned in.

"Bogies," he said quietly, appearing to anyone who might've been looking that he was having a normal conversation with George. George grinned.

"Bogies," he said, a little louder than Fred, but still not noticeable enough. The twins started giggling. This game was fun already. Harry had looked up when the twins started giggling and had guessed why. He grinned. Fred meanwhile, took another mouthful of shepherd's pie, contemplating his next move. He swallowed the food, looked around, and cleared his throat.

"Bogies," he said in a normal voice. Angelina, who was sitting next to him, turned round.

"Did you say something Fred?" she asked.

"No," said Fred innocently, whilst George collapsed in silent laughter. Angelina raised an eyebrow at Fred suspiciously, before turning back to continue her conversation with Alicia. It took George a full five minutes to recover from his giggling fit before he made his next move.

"Bogies," he said quite loudly. Fred snorted with laughter. Angelina turned round.

"What the hell did you say 'Bogies' for?" she asked, confused, whilst Fred laughed so hard that pumpkin juice came out of his nose. George pretended to be offended.

"How dare you accuse me of saying stupid words!" he cried in a mock horrified tone, whilst placing a hand over his heart in an over-dramatic gesture. "I'm outraged!" Angelina turned to Alicia and shrugged. Harry, who hadn't taken his eyes off the twins, giggled at George's drama queen act. Ron glanced up.

"What's so funny?" he asked. Harry pointed at the twins.

"They're playing Bogies," he said, and giggled even more at the puzzled expression on Ron's face. Hermione, who had been reading her Arithmancy book, sighed.

"It's a Muggle game, Ron," she explained, "And it's a childish game at that." She looked at Harry, who was staring at her.

"What? I watch Muggle TV when I'm at home you know," she said. Harry nodded.

"I'm not doubting that. It's just…well…I wouldn't expect _you _to watch a children's TV show," he said.

"I _don't_ watch it. I saw one show by accident. I couldn't sleep that morning," she explained, whilst Ron and Harry exchanged glances.

"Yeah, _sure_ you did, Hermione," said Ron, rolling his eyes. Hermione looked scandalized, and went to say something else, but at that moment Fred had his turn at the game.

"Bogies," he said, this time so loud that the Gryffindor's and Hufflepuff's sitting nearest all turned to stare at him. He broke down with laughter. George was crying with mirth. He looked around and saw that everyone was waiting for him to make his next move.

"BOGIES!" he cried, before ducking his head down towards the table. The rest of the students in the Hall all looked over to the Gryffindor table, before they started muttering to each other. Even the professors noticed. They glanced at the Gryffindors. Dumbledore smiled. '_Excellent; a game of Bogies_,' he thought to himself.

Back at the table, Fred was waiting for the right moment. He carried on eating for a few minutes, wondering how on earth he was going to top that. Then an idea came to his mind. He looked around, noticing that everyone was watching him, and he stood up. George gasped, then started laughing even harder. Fred stood there for a moment.

"BOOOGGGIIIEEES!" he yelled, then quickly resumed his place at the table, whilst the students in the Hall screamed with laughter. McGonagall up at the staff table, turned to Dumbledore.

"Are you going to allow this to continue, Albus?" she asked, dangerously. Dumbledore peered at her.

"And spoil such fun, Minerva?" he said gently.

George was laughing so much that for a second, he considered handing the game to Fred. But seeing the looks of eagerness on his fellow students' faces, he knew what he must do. Getting to his feet, he surveyed the Hall. Then he got up on the bench. He caught Fred's eye and almost began laughing again, but he quickly recovered. He took a deep breath.

"BOOOOGGGGIIIIEEEESSSS!" he screamed, before jumping down from the bench and running from the Hall, closely followed by Fred. Once outside, they fell to the floor, wheezing with laughter. They could hear the students inside laughing and talking about what had just happened, and this made them laugh even more.

"Did you…see…McGonagall's…face?" wheezed George.

"I thought…she was…gonna…kill us all," panted Fred.

"Are you gonna…follow that up?" asked George.

"Do you think…I should?" asked Fred. George nodded. Fred grinned. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself down, before heading to the Hall entrance.

"BOGIES!" he yelled into the Hall, then turned and ran back to George, who was laughing so much that his face now matched his hair colour.

"I won!" he yelled, "You didn't beat mine!"

"I know, I know," said Fred, grinning. "But for the first game, that wasn't too bad an effort." George gazed at Fred.

"The first game? You mean we're going to play it again?"

"Of course! I have to beat you now," said Fred. He stopped and listened. "Reckon they're gonna talk about that all night," he said, nodding towards the Hall.

"Reckon you're right," said George. The twins smirked at each other. Then they headed up the stairs to the Gryffindor common room to await the rest of their house.

* * *

Back in the Hall, Harry was still laughing about the twins' quick exit. All around him, people were asking each other what this game was all about. He smiled to himself and stole a glance at the staff table. Dumbledore was smiling, which surprised Harry, but he wasn't so surprised to see the rest of the staff looking angry. McGonagall looked furious; Snape, livid. Umbridge seemed to have forced herself to smile along with Dumbledore, though Harry could tell she was just as annoyed or maybe even more so, than Snape. He nudged Ron and pointed to the staff table.

"D'ya reckon they'll get in trouble for that?"

"Nah, not if Dumbledore's ok with it," Ron replied, getting up from his seat. Dinner was over, so the Gryffindor's headed back to their common room, all talking about Fred and George's little 'display' in the Hall. Upon entering the common room, Harry, Ron and Hermione headed over to the sofa in front of the fire, where the twins were explaining the game to their fellow students.

"And here's the man who introduced us to the game," announced George, pointing at Harry, whilst Fred began applauding him. Harry grinned sheepishly. Lee Jordan ran over.

"Wow Harry, that's such a good game! How did you think of that?"

"I didn't. It's a Muggle game from a TV programme," he said. Lee looked confused.

"What's 'TV'?" he asked.

"What? Oh, nevermind," Harry said quickly. He glanced over at the twins. "Well done guys."

"Thanks Harry!" they replied in unison, before turning back to their attentive audience. Harry turned to Ron and Hermione.

"Looks like they've cheered up a bit," he said, smiling. Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Did you have to tell them that game? They'll be playing it all the time now and…"

"Night, Hermione," said Harry, loudly. She looked at him and crossed her arms.

"Fine! Goodnight," she replied and stormed off upstairs to her room. Ron grinned.

"Well done, mate, or she would've carried on like that all night."

Harry laughed, then headed up to his room. He got changed into his pyjamas, and snuggled down in his bed. He was glad he'd managed to cheer the twins up. The only problems now were when and where would the next game of 'Bogies' commence?


	3. Blame It On The Bogie

03 - Blame It On The Bogie

The answer to Harry's question was revealed four days later, when Fred and George were headed to Umbridge's classroom. The fuss over their first game had died down, and in fact, most people had forgotten about it. Most people, except Fred, George and Harry. So it was this fateful day that Fred and George were walking towards Umbridge's lesson, when Fred had a bright idea. He turned to his twin and whispered in his ear. George giggled and nodded his head. The twins grinned evilly at each other before entering the classroom, and took their usual place in the room: third row from the back, two seats from the end.

The lesson began normally enough. Well, as normal as it could be for an Umbridge lesson.

"Wands away please," she said in her saccharine-sweet voice. "And turn to chapter 4 in your books please."

The class followed her orders, inwardly groaning at this torture. Usually, Fred and George would also have groaned, but today was different, for the Weasley twins had other things on their minds. Obediently, they turned to chapter 4 and began reading. Lee Jordan couldn't believe his eyes: Fred and George were working? If either of the twins saw Lee's stare, they showed no sign of it and continued to read. Umbridge smirked to herself: finally, she was getting people to obey her. Satisfied that everyone was reading quietly, Umbridge opened her own book and began to read. However, as it turned out, not everyone was reading quietly.

The first utterance of 'Bogies' from George was so quiet that Fred wasn't sure if he'd actually heard his brother say it. He looked up quizzically at George, who gave him a thumbs-up sign, and Fred smiled.

"Bogies," he whispered, and collapsed in silent giggles.

"Bogies," replied George a bit louder, and he too started to shake with laughter.

"Bogies," said Fred again, loud enough that Lee heard it.

"You're not playing that again?" he whispered, though he was grinning. The twins nodded and Fred held a finger to his lips, indicating for Lee to be quiet.

"Bogies!" said George, louder, making Katie and Alicia turn round and glare at him. The twins and Lee cupped their hands over their mouths to repress their giggles.

"Honestly," whispered Katie exasperatedly. Fred poked her in the back and when she turned to look at him, he mouthed the words 'Shut up!' at her. Then it was his turn in the game.

"Bogies!" he said in a normal, conversational tone of voice. Several members of the class turned to look at the twins over their shoulders, smirking and giggling at the twins' game. It was the giggling that caught Umbridge's attention.

"What is going on?" she asked sweetly, looking up in the direction of the twins.

"Nothing, miss. I just needed to cough," replied Fred, straight-faced, whilst Lee, George and several other members of the class suppressed fits of laughter. Umbridge peered suspiciously at Fred for a few moments, but deciding he was telling the truth, turned back to her book.

"Next time that you need to cough, Mr Weasley, please do so without disrupting the rest of the class," she added as an afterthought. Fred nodded, then turned to his brother.

"Your turn," he whispered, an evil smirk crossing his lips. George grinned.

"Bogiiieees," he said, drawing out the last part of the word. All the students in the room started to laugh, and unfortunately for George, Umbridge heard him too.

"What was that, Mr Weasley?" she asked, a dangerous edge to her otherwise girly voice. George shrugged.

"I don't know, miss."

"Don't play dumb with me," she threatened, but still keeping that sweet girly voice, which made her threat altogether more sinister. Fred giggled.

"Dumb is all George knows," he whispered to Lee, and the two of them laughed loudly.

"You think he is funny?" Umbridge said, addressing the two giggling boys.

"No, miss," Lee and Fred replied in unison, keeping their eyes downcast towards the desk. Umbridge regarded all three boys, then took out a sheet of pink paper and started to write something on it.

"We'll see how funny you think he is," she said menacingly, before thrusting the piece of paper towards Fred. "You three will take this to Professor McGonagall. Now. Any questions?" she added, and waited for a reply. The three boys exchanged glances, before George raised his hand.

"I have a question," he said. Umbridge looked faintly surprised.

"And that is?" she replied.

"How come it takes three of us to take a sheet of paper to Professor McGonagall? Surely it's not that heavy," he said, as deadpan as he could. That did it.

"YOU INSOLENT LITTLE…" she began, but Fred cut her off.

"Be careful what you say, Professor Umbridge. There are lots of children here. We don't want them learning any naughty words now, do we?" he mocked, causing more giggles from the students.

"Shut up," Umbridge hissed, livid, and the class became silent. She brought the piece of paper she'd been holding back to her desk with a slam, and scribbled something else on it, before rather violently shoving it into Fred's hands. "You three. Go now."

And they did just that. Fred, George and Lee grabbed their things and quietly walked out of the door, noticing that a few of their classmates were giving them thumbs up as they left. Once out in the safety of the hallway, the trio began laughing again until they were out of breath. It was then that Lee spoke.

"I supposed we should get going then," he said, and the twins nodded.

"Wait a sec," said Fred, and he went back to the classroom door.

"What are you doing?" asked George, as he exchanged a confused look with Lee. Fred merely smiled and placed a finger to his lips, a gesture that told the other two boys to be quiet. He stood facing the classroom entrance, readying himself for what he was about to do, and then he flung open the door to the room.

"BOOOO-GGGIIIEES!" he screamed into the room, and then he slammed the door shut and tore off down the hallway, closely followed by Lee and George. They ran through the castle and only stopped when they were outside McGonagall's classroom, where they collapsed from both laughing and being out of breath.

"Wow…that…was amazing!" said Lee, in between gulping down air.

"Yeah…I didn't…think…you were going…to top mine!" said George, grinning. Fred smiled at his brother.

"You know what…this means, don't you?" he said, and seeing the puzzled look on George's face, he continued. "It means…we're even now. You've…won once, and I've won once."

George nodded. "So looks like we'll have to play again."

"Once we get this detention over with," replied Fred.

"Question is, boys, where will you play next?" asked Lee, looking at the twins. They both shrugged, and turned to McGonagall's classroom, where the door had opened and McGonagall stood staring at them.

"What are you doing out here?" she questioned, and Fred handed her the piece of paper. She looked disgustedly at the lurid pink paper before skimming over the writing on the page.

"Detention with Professor Umbridge…for 6 weeks…for saying Bogies in a lesson. Well, boys, it looks like you'll be having the pleasure of Professor Umbridge's company for the next 6 weeks," the Gryffindor head of year said, fixing her gaze on her students. Then without another word, she swept back into her classroom and shut the door behind her. The three boys looked at each other.

"Detention with Umbridge. Bring it on," Lee said, and the boys laughed again as they headed up to their common room, waiting for their detention with Umbridge to begin.


	4. Warning: Potion Contains Bogies

04 - Warning: Potion Contains Bogies

Had Fred, George and Lee known that detention with Umbridge would have been as painful as it was, perhaps they would've thought twice about playing Bogies in her lesson. As it was, they were all now unfortunate victims of her rather unusual punishment, and the scars on the back of their hands were permanent reminders to not play Bogies in Umbridge's presence again. So it goes without saying that the game was retired for the 6 weeks that they had detention. However, it wasn't completely forgotten about…

"Turn to page 197," said Snape, as he swished down the aisles of desks towards his own desk at the front of the room. He watched as his most hated students, the Gryffindors, turned slowly to the page he'd requested. Sometimes he wondered if they were intentionally slow, just to annoy him, and the thought crossed his mind that if they were going any slower they'd be going backwards. A small smirk formed on his face, but was quickly replaced by his trademark scowl as the students turned their attention back to him.

"You are going to make the Blindsight potion," he said and pointed to a cupboard on the far side of the room. "The ingredients you need are over there. Please take note that the Bat Bogeys need to be added only after…"

Snape's voice droned on, but the Weasley twins only heard it as background noise. They slowly looked up at each other and smiled evilly.

"Bogies," Fred whispered, and his smile broadened.

"Bogies," George whispered back, and his smile broadened too. Oh yes, Bogies was very much back in the world of Hogwarts. As the class began to move around gathering ingredients for the potion, Fred and George continued to quietly play the game, not wanting to attract too much attention too soon. It was only after Fred's 6th turn in the game that the other Gryffindors begin to notice. Slowly, word spread around the class and soon all the students were listening out for the sound of Bogies. When it reached George's 8th turn in the game, he said the word so loudly that it was impossible to miss. Quite right, since Snape had heard.

"Yes, Mr Weasley?" he asked, coldly, but George didn't answer. Snape stood and stalked over to the twins' desk. He stared down at them, his dark figure looming over them and casting a shadow over both boys.

"When a person asks you a question, Mr Weasley, it is polite to answer them," Snape said quietly, and waited for an answer. But the twins remained silent.

"You would be wise to answer my question," Snape admonished, but there was still no acknowledgement from the Weasley brothers. Their silence started to annoy Snape, and just as he felt himself begin to lose control, Fred shouted.

"BOGIES!" he yelled, right in Snape's face, much to the surprise of the rest of the students, who immediately burst out laughing. George gazed at his brother, a look of shock and awe on his face that Fred would have the courage to do that. Even Fred looked surprised at himself. But it was the look on Snape's face that was the real picture. At first he looked shocked, then he looked confused, before finally his expression turned into one of pure fury.

"How dare you," he whispered vehemently, his voice shaking in anger. "Get out of my sight!"

The twins, whilst they may appear to be fools, were not completely without sense. Knowing that maybe they had finally tipped Snape over the edge, they quickly gathered up their things and practically ran towards the door. Fred was the first one out of the door, but George not wanting to be beaten, stopped, turned round, screamed "BOGIES!" at Snape one more time, then ran for his life after his brother. Now if Fred's first scream hadn't shocked him enough, George's scream certainly did stun Snape. He stood, trembling with rage and trying to calm himself down, before he fixed his gaze on his remaining students.

"For your classmates' outrageous behaviour, all points will be removed from Gryffindor," Snape said smoothly, in a low voice. The Gryffindors all stared at him in horror.

"But sir! You can't do that! It isn't fair!" protested Lee, but Snape shot him the kind of look that would kill if it could.

"If fairness is your concern, take up the issue with your fellow classmates, because it is no concern of mine," hissed Snape and Lee fell silent. Then Snape turned and went back to his desk. "You will finish your potions in silence," he ordered, and the class resumed their work.

* * *

Meanwhile, the twins had retreated to the safety of the Gryffindor common room, laughing over their latest game.

"Did you see the greasy git's face when you shouted at him?" said George, holding his stomach, since it hurt from all the laughter.

"Yeah, I thought he was going to be sick or something!" laughed Fred. "I'm surprised he took it as well as he did, though."

George looked incredulous. "What are you talking about? You know he's going to kill us for this, don't you? He probably thought we were insulting the size of his nose, which by the way I swear is getting bigger!"

The twins doubled over in yet more fits of laughter, and didn't even hear the bell ring or hear Angelina approach them. When they did notice that she was there, however, they noticed that she did not look happy. No, not happy at all.

"Hey, Angelina. What's up?" asked Fred, uncertainly, because Angelina was giving him the strangest of looks.

"You have to stop playing that stupid game," she said, and Fred grinned.

"Come on, it's just a bit of fun," he replied, but Angelina silenced him with a glare.

"No, it's not fun anymore. Snape took away all of Gryffindor's points," she announced.

"What? All of them?" George asked, dumbfounded. Angelina nodded.

"Yes, all of them. So you have to stop playing that game. You can't ruin Gryffindor's chances for the cup," she stated before she went up to her dorm. The twins exchanged glances, and silently agreed not to play Bogies again. At least, not during school hours.


	5. Epilogue

05 - Epilogue

As the school year progressed, Umbridge became High Inquisitor of Hogwarts, and her first rule was to ban the game of Bogies from being played anywhere, at any time, in the school. This was a rule that some of the teachers, namely Snape, agreed to wholeheartedly. Indeed, when it was first announced at breakfast in the Great Hall, Snape would have smiled if he were capable of doing so. It was also a rule that caused much protest from the students, who thought that such a rule was unfair and ridiculous for a child's game but they eventually gave up on getting the rule overturned, especially when Dumbledore agreed that Bogies should be banned. But though Bogies was gone, it was definitely not forgotten, and forever remained in the hearts and minds of the students of Hogwarts.

Later on that fateful day when Bogies had been banned, the teachers of Hogwarts were sitting in the staff room, discussing the new rule. Or rather, Umbridge was discussing the new rule, and the other teachers were pretending to listen.

"…and besides, that game was awfully childish. These students need educational stimulation, so they won't turn to silly games that disrupt lessons," she said, smiling sweetly. However, she realised that no one had heard her, so she cleared her throat and spoke again.

"Well, I must be going to my next class," she said, and left the room. The other teachers grinned at each other as the High Inquisitor left, and all resumed their various tasks. There was silence in the staff room. McGonagall sat quietly marking her students work. Trelawney was staring out of the window, imagining what stories she could tell to her next class about their futures. Flitwick was trying to charm his cup of tea so that it would turn into a cup of hot chocolate. Snape was reading the latest edition of Dark Arts Weekly, particularly enjoying an article about people who had performed curses that had gone wrong and caused various deformities. Dumbledore was eating his way through a bag of sherbet lemon sweets, but was also intently watching his employees, unbeknownst to them. In the dead quiet of the staff room Dumbledore, with a twinkle in his eye, spoke a single word.

"Bogies…"

* * *

A/N: _Well, there it is. My first Harry Potter fic. It's been a long time in the making, and for anyone who was wondering, I did not write this because Rupert Grint played Bogies on UK TV – I started it ages ago but never got around to finishing it until now. Please read and review, I don't mind if you hate it!_


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